If you are not in love with the stock market then your relationship is heading for a quick and necessary end. Now, do not get me wrong, I am not talking about being married to the stock market or to a particular stock, as that is something I have previously discussed here. While being in love is an important element within a successful marriage, marriage is not a necessary prerequisite for being in love. You can have one without the other, which is the case when discussing our relationship with the stock market. Let’s think about the characteristics of being in love and how each one of these relates to a healthy relationship.
1. When you are in love you are passionate about someone. What does this mean? It means that when you get up in the morning and when you go to bed at night you are thinking about how wonderful it is to have a relationship with the stock market. During the day, while everyone else is thinking about and performing work that they are not so happy about you are whistling and singing and are happy that you are able to spend time with the stock market. It means that no matter what the day may bring you are right where you want to be. Being in love with the stock market means you could not be as happy if you were with anyone else doing anything else. You have a passion for the stock market. It is as clear as the smile on your face.
2. When you are in love you accept who your partner is. The person you fall in love with is not perfect. She has faults just like anyone else, including yourself. But we tend to overlook these faults and accept them, recognizing that each individual we meet brings their own personality, years in development, to the relationship. The stock market is by no means perfect. There are many imperfections in the stock market but would you not agree that most of the imperfections are not really imperfections but a mere projection of our own misunderstanding of the market’s personality? If you are truly in love with the stock market you will accept the stock market for who she is. You might not like it but you will accept it. You won’t be able to change her or make her into someone she was never meant to be. In so doing, the relationship has a chance to grow and develop. Proper stock trading is not a take, but an acceptance of a give and take relationship.
3. When you are in love you open yourself up to emotional trauma. You know as well as I do that when you fall in love with someone you are taking the chance on getting hurt. It is the old riddle “Is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?” You take the risk but since you are in love you rationalize that it is well worth that risk. Here you have to ask yourself: I have the opportunity to fall in love with this new person, let’s call her Stock Market. Do I take advantage of the opportunity knowing that I can get hurt, or do I ignore her and go on my merry way without her? Individuals meet Stock Market every day in various ways but the ones who decide to take advantage of a wonderful relationship need be prepared for a few downs along with the ups. Mark my word, the downs are going to come. But if you are in love you will get over the hurt and continue to forge that relationship, even if by fire. That is what people in love do! They forgive and forget!
If you are wanting to make it as a successful trader you need to consider whether or not you have the proper relationship with the market. Are you willing to accept the market’s personality? Are you really passionate about the market? Are you ready to enjoy the hurt? Are you in love?
